I have really been trying to get my act together and thought I was winning, but last night I went to the track with a couple of dogs and your man who I hadnt seen for quite some time started on about why didnt I email him any more and why didnt I send him a Christmas card and wasnt it about time I got back to being myself!!! I could have hit him, as I said I have really been trying but apparently not enough for some people. Its not as if I dwell on the subject of Steve, I involve myself in their conversation and laugh at their corny jokes, and that is why I have this blog, so I can air my thoughts for myself and get the frustration out of my system and dont seem to be wallowing in self pity to our aquaintances and friends...I just hope it starts working soon, I really want to just remember the good and funny times without reverting back to the sadness which I feel at the moment, as I said before how long does grieving last?